Wednesday, September 14, 2011

This post isn't about television.

I've been thinking a lot lately about future stuff. Not robots who will take over the world or the thing on The Jetsons that Jane uses to do her hair every morning (though, who wouldn't want that?), but my future. My future self. I'm afraid this post is going to err on the side of the serious, so if you're looking for laughs aplenty, you may want to skedaddle. But don't do that! You can sit there and listen to me anyway. You obviously have the time, you clicked on my link.
I recently learned that if everything goes smoothly, I am going to graduate next December.

Next December.


So obviously that's a big deal.

Graduation means a lot of good things, like no more classes (unless I decide to go for a grad degree), no more frantically writing papers at three in the morning, and being sort of like a grownup and having a cool grownup job.

It also means a lot of scary things, like paying off student loan money, having big responsibilities, and being sort of like a grownup and having a scary grownup job that I'm not even sure how to find yet.

I mean, I don't even really know what I want to be when the inevitable growing up occurs. I know I want to write, I know I want to have a degree. It would be awesome to go write for SNL or something, but that sounds scary, and I don't know if I have that sort of talent. I could go write a book or something, but again, I don't know that I'm talented enough.

That is, if I even graduate then.
I might fail French, putting me a semester behind that date. The study abroad I want to do next summer might fall through, requiring me to take two additional classes here. I might make it to graduation, and then not find a job and find myself on the streets, unable to buy cat food as my student loan debt slowly takes over my entire being.

So what do you do when you're staring down graduation with a host of little insecurities whispering into your ear about all of the possible ways you could fail? I mean, besides pray?

Oh, here's a pic of my cat.